I want to share with you a text- a work of art -my friend S wrote last night about bodies shapes and the modern view on it that has so many teenage girls rotting inside. I found myself touched by her words, by her style, and inspired to share it with you. All I'd ever have to say, she already has. Share it with your friends, it's worth the read.
I am almost 20 and I still don’t know why I was constantly being told to lose weight when I was a kid. I wasn’t obese. I was slightly overweight. So, wh(at)y?
Was it for health concerns? I played tennis 2/6 and as soon as summer came I threw swimming to the mix, not to mention running on Saturdays after the matches. I ate healthy, despite my relationship to sweets. I never was slim though. I had people call me fat when I was in my top performance.
Was it to impress and be liked by boys? Boys love a slim body, because that’s what they’re being told to like. My mother never wanted me to impress boys, she never cared about the men in my life, but she knew symmetry, beauty and fitting in was power. I think you can find beauty where you want to, but it’s not her fault that she saw beauty in a fat-free body, that would fit in any design.
Was it to fit into those trendy clothes that were always a size smaller than I was? I guess so. But why? Why was looking good so important? Better ask yourself another question. Why was fitting in to the size that society liked and called beautiful so important? Why is/was fitting in so important?
Was it because a slimmer body always looks good? Why does a slimmer body always look better? People like you when you are average. Average: ‘all the people put together to create the average face’. A face you can take a look at and see so many people. You watch the face and it reminds you of so many people, it looks familiar to you, and therefore you like it. It takes a higher mind to like something foreign and unfamiliar. Then again, what’s familiar and unfamiliar is highly subjective. You can try to incorporate everything into yourself, so that everyone likes you.
So what’s up with bodies?
It doesn’t work the same way as with faces. Some think Bodies have a purpose, and the sole purpose of a body is to be able to preserve the DNA, and since everything is related, a beautiful body is a statement for good genes. The Hourglass though, means that you are more than capable of carrying and raising a child. The top down triangle means you are able to hunt and fight and secure food. I really don’t think that it boils down to this. Having an Hourglass doesn’t mean you are going to be a good genes preserver and if it does mean that, it means just that and nothing else more. But the hourglass is not what we are talking about. A slim body is now a glorified object, approved by society and if you want to fit in and be liked, well you know what to do.
Losing weight takes so much time. Sometimes I find myself working out and looking at the mirror non-stop to check the flatness of my belly. Down that rabbit hole I go sometimes. Then I stop eating, my diet becomes poor and I get obsessed with working out and eating as less as possible. Therefore I have to stop working out, because I automatically relate workout to loosing weight and I become obsessed. I check my priorities, and, my mental functioning is high up there. It needs food. So what is happening? Why are we linking movement and sports and playing to Weight loss? They are not related. Do it because it feels good, not because of the shallow and irrelevant goal that everyone seems to be chasing.
When I was applying at the Uni, I was constantly afraid that my weight could/ would affect my acceptance. I thought being fat was an indication for poor willpower as in no ability to accomplish what you set your mind to and what the society wants you to accomplish. Well, I never wanted to do that. I am not here to do what I am/will be told to do, if I don’t personally agree with it. I have not lost weight because I never understood why I was being told to lose weight, why did I have to lose weight? It was a constant battle for me, because of not knowing why.
I am one of those overweight girls that has accomplished everything I have consciously decided to accomplish. It is worthless for you to stigmatise me just because I am not deciding to fit in, just because I do not like the standards of the society and just because I do not like what you like. Therefore I have realised you do not have to like me, or my body, neither my mind and my ideas. People have different likes, but it takes an open mind to realise what you really like, without being influenced by interfering media. Anyhow, Anyway you will have to respect my ideas, my efforts and my successes, the negative feedbacks that I get from my work and all what comes to people that try. In all that, please don’t link my Work to my body. If I’m healthy all around, how much fat I have and how many seats my behinds occupy is not a Topic of discussion. Adaption, if it is going to go any further than this, is not in the body, is in the mind.
I want to take this chance and talk about the so called modern feminists that today’s PopCulture is producing. The Hypocrites that claim beauty is not everything, but on the other hand use nothing but beauty and image to make it in the industry. Don’t be fooled so easily. Maybe it is just the way that the industry works. Selling sex, objectifying females’ body( and lately, as a part of this modern ‘feminism’ males’ as well), transmitting little to no meaning and idea whatsoever and affecting audiences by pure marketing. The subconscious works in so many ways and levels, but that’s not the truth. It is being covered by flashing smiles and slim bodies. After all, it is what we want, or do we want it because we are being told to want it? I think trend comes from the people.
Not so important fitting in. Beauty is not everything, being healthy and thinking is much more important. Let us not be bedazzled by lights and vain sensation. Let us not be impressed by marketing. Think. Live long and prosper. Sing your own song. Happy and Healthy teenage years!
I am mostly writing this as a letter to my teenage self. I would devastate my body and my mind for days in order to lose weight, not knowing why I was doing it. I have answered my question to myself, and by writing it I hope it can serve as an answer to other girls who may have the same question. Anyways it’s my point of view and I had to somehow let it out.
I guess I need to add more things, maybe soon.
—————I tend to forget my ideas—————grrr————but they come again soon————–till then———-I am satisfied—————–I can now go do my work—————————Period—————-Stop————————————–